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April Fools Day: A Beginner's Guide

I love April Fool’s Day, for a prankster like myself there’s no better day for me to stretch my imagination to the limits. This year ladies, let’s do something other than the “I’m pregnant” April Fool’s Day joke. It’s time to get creative.

April Fool’s Day falls on a Tuesday this year, which is great because it gives us all day to prepare and take advantage of the fact that our spouses are at work. To get your creative juices flowing, here are my top ten favorite pranks to play on your spouse.

What’s That Funky Smell?

It’s the toilet. Call your spouse while they are at work and tell them the toilet broke, there’s something wrong with the septic system, you have no idea. All you know is, the house smells like an outhouse and you can’t stand it. They need to come home immediately. Once he does come home, make it worth his while. You’ve tricked him, now it’s time to give him his treat.

The Missing Link.

What if your life really was like a Lifetime Movie, complete with a long lost child? You can enlist the help of you kid’s friends on this one. Find a kid that your spouse hasn’t met yet and tell him that this woman came by today and dropped this kid off, she said the child was his and she just left. This works especially well if your spouse has an ex that just dropped off the face of the earth for no apparent reason.

There’s A Hole, Where?

If you have toddler boys, they’ve been known to break a few things. What if they broke the TV because they were throwing a ball in the house and shattered it? I would cry if this happened to me, but if it was a joke, hilarious…

Pay-Per-View.

If you’re like me, you live in a very tight budget. Any deviation from that budget and it’s a colossal disaster. There’s nothing worse than getting the phone call that the cable bill is $600 because some one went overboard with the PPV movies that month. Let your spouse believe the lie until they get home and then show them the real bill. 

Your House Is Now A Hotel.

Most men hate it when their In Laws come to visit, more so when they come for an extended stay. Give your honey a call on April Fool’s Day and give them the heads up. Mom and Dad are in town for a surprise extended stay. Be creative and come up with a good reason why. This prank works even better if they are already in town.

We’re In The Money.

Wouldn’t it be great if you won the lottery? Today you just did. If you’re tech savvy, get an old lottery ticket, scan it and make a new one with the day before’s numbers. Just wait until your spouse gets home before you lay the news on him, you wouldn’t want him to quit his job,

Ready, Aim, Fire!

This is one of my personal favorites for getting the kids in the house involved in pranks. Grab yourself some Nerf guns or some water guns. Prep them in advance and tell the kids to be ready for when Dad gets home. Hide out and as soon as he walks in the door, let loose. It will be a memory the kids will never forget.

Vulnerability Sucks.

I’m back to the Nerf guns again. One of my favorite things is to catch people when they’re at their most vulnerable. In true Zombieland style, I’m going to catch you while you’re on the toilet. There’s nothing worse than getting hit with Nerf gun darts while you’re trying to take a dump.

Glitter, Glitter Everywhere.

This one is another of my favorites but you have to plan ahead. Make sure the car is off, turn the air vents to high and make sure they are open and pointed directly at the driver, Then go ahead and dump a container of glitter in there. When your spouse next turns on their car, POOF. This can also be done with confetti but I prefer glitter because it’s like being tarred and feathered, that shit never completely comes off.

Face Painting.

There’s something funny about waking up with sharpie on your face. Wait until your spouse goes to sleep for this one, but remember, pay back is a bitch.

I this little list gets your creative juices flowing this year. Anything is better than the I’m preggers joke. Just remember, revenge is a dish best served cold.

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One thought on “April Fools Day: A Beginner's Guide

  1. Once we were leaving on a long road trip on New Years–we waited till we were 4 hours in, and then told my Dad that we forgot to pack his suitcase. (Don’t worry, we did, but the lie definitely got him scared!)

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